Just finished up a weekend of hanging out with the youth ministry folks at Emmanuel UMC in Noblesville, IN and their great youth pastor, Nate Harrison. What great kids! What a great youth worker! They looked long and hard for him and I’m thinking they hit a jackpot with that one.

This is a church with a YM that has a lot going for it. But – and there’s always a big but – one dynamic they identified that’s not working so well is that while the youth come faithfully, and obviously love it…they don’t bring their friends very often. One said, “I have in the past but nobody talked to her.” “Well, we woulda but you two sat in the corner the whole time!”

Most of us get it that its necessary to teach youth members how to welcome in the newbie. (One way is to not call them “newbie.”) But it occurred to us that perhaps the “friendship epidemic” education has stopped short of training the actual student who brings a friend. Where should they go? How should they arrive? What should happen? You smellin’ what I’m smearin’?

So here are some bullet points I would go over with my youth about how to bring a friend:

1-Tell your students to call you ahead of time with the heads-up that they’re bringing a friend. You can make sure you’re ready and not running around setting up.

2-Ask the students to pick their friends up instead of meeting them at the location so that the member can show the friend the secret to knowing where to find the youth room. I’ve seen some that were harder to find than what Nicolas Cage went through finding the National Treasure. (Throw up some signs, people!)

So I’m winging my way towards Indy this morning. I’m on a layover in Memphis and my flight is delayed.

Interesting how that doesn’t aggravate me. No, what bugged me was none of the power outlets worked. How inconvenient! I have to wait 1.45 hours AND I can’t recharge?

I will say what you may be thinking: I am an idiot. Well, I was for that moment anyway. What was I to do? How would I get by? How would my tightly scheduled youth ministry world ever keep spinning? Oh the inhumanity of it all!

I bet you would been a lot quicker to turn this gift of unplugged time around, wouldn’t you? You’re already thinking of ideas:

*People watch and pray
*Write notes to your student leaders
*Open up that hard copy of the Bible (it’s in your book bag somewhere!)
*Savor a cup of coffee from the Sbux that’s directly across from you.
*Strike up a conversation with the little old person sitting alone.

Those are great ideas! You’re so creative. Think I’ll try a few right now.

Thanks for the gift, God.

Stephanie

I get the privilege to be at a lot of youth ministry training events. I like big one and I’m also fan of local youth ministry events. The home grown aspect appeals to me. I like the thought of churches pooling their resources and making connectionalism happen. I’ve seen the quality at these regional events vary from “This was grrrrrrreeeeeaaaaat!  to “I’m never teaching here again.” (A bad attitude, I know, but it was THAT bad.)

Here’s a list of what makes it great from a speaker’s perspective. None of these are out of reach for local churches who band together.

1) Provide the projector: Don’t ask the workshop leaders to also have to fool with that. Borrow from each of the churches working together.

2) Make sure speakers are available: This is a frequent overlooked detail. they only have to be a personal small set from somebody’s home computer.

3) Anticipate for Mac/PC: Make sure that there are a few of those VGA adapters for Macs. Most presenters with a Mac carry that but just in case.

4) Use a power strip: Remember that the workshop leader has a few things to plug in, too.

5) Use room hosts: Have a person in each room assigned to make sure that the workshop has all it needs.

6) Check-in table: Hey the event may be small, but hospitality is free! Make sure there’s a clearly marked place for your presenters to go to near the main entrance.

7) Book Table: It might be hard for you all to pull off a book table’s inventory, but workshop leaders MIGHT have books to ask before hand, have whoever brings books to see mark theirs with name and price and provide someone on your team to be the cashier. Have cash or a check available at the end of the day for the presenter.

8) Pay the Presenter: Its nice to walk away from the event with a check instead of putting the presenter in an uncomfortable position of having to ask. If you need an invoice, send them one before the event so checks can be ready. I did a workshop for a somewhat friend once where I had to ask for the agreed upon payment twice and had to find/send the email where we’d made the original agreement. Awkward!

9) Name tags: Use them! Make everyone wear them. Never assume everyone knows everyone.

10) Have gathering sounds system stuff worked out IN ADVANCE: It may be a small event but there’s no need to sound checks when everyone’s sitting there staring at the people up front.

OK, I’ve got more thoughts but this will do for now. Oh, one more: Don’t announce last minute! Send a “save the date” 6 months out; details at 4 months out, team pricing registration requests at two months till event, one month “last minute” special and a 7 days away reminder. 

Stephanie

Lots of people are commenting on anything and everything about the upcoming election. Some people should be…but I’m not one of them. Maybe you’re not either. There are beaucoup youth and youth workers in my world who watch what I say or do and I don’t want this to be a stumbling block to them in any way.

From my point of view, too many posts and comments are hurtful and divisive, even when they’re not meant to be. I’m speaking mainly of church ministry friends who are making their thoughts abundantly clear about which way they’ll be voting come November. That’s OK…but so many of the comments leave me feeling as if I’m stupid for thinking a different way. Worse yet, many of my ministry friends and mentors I look up to have posted thoughts like a line’s  been drawn in the sand between me and them. Somehow, the black/white comments leaning this way or that make me wonder: would I be less loved by them if they knew which way I’m voting? I’m glad I’m confident in my place in the Kingdom but I worry that others will be negatively affected by seeing what Christians are criticizing each other about on Facebook or Twitter.

I’m going to stay out of it in social media form. Oh believe me, I have strong opinions and worries and thoughts on this election. But they’re mine and I’ll only discuss them with friends when I am sure that what I say won’t leave the other person feeling less affirmed about who they are with me and with the Kingdom.

Unless free Starbucks for all becomes part of a candidate’s platform. Then all bets are off on everything I just said.

Stephanie

So post Labor Day, back to school time has arrived for everyone in the country. A common question many youth workers face? No, not whether if its OK to sneak in a few more wearings of your white shorts. We’re youth workers! A) We don’t care about what to wear when and B) Its never smart for a youth worker to wear anything all-white.

I was thinking more along the lines of what to do with our “post high school” hanger-ons, those graduates who were not part of the mass exodus off to college. You know the type I mean. Its the former student who still keeps showing up…and I’m here to tell you: more often than not? Their presence presents a problem.

What to do? On one hand, its not their fault your church doesn’t have a great college/young adult ministry. I mean, maybe the “hanger-on” will suddenly grow up and be an awesome volunteer with the blink of a magical eye or the turn of a calendar page. One day a student; the next an adult volunteer.

Here’s my take: I learned the HARD way from two guys named Scott and Craig. (Circa 1990: “Youth group just did not meet my needs tonight.” “Well, you’re 19 years old. Its not supposed to.”)

Post grads need to take a year break from your student ministry, whether they’re off to school or stay-at-home members of your church. Otherwise, its too hard for them to make the distinction between what used to be geared towards their needs and what is now not age-appropriate educationally. Its also hard for the still-in-the-group youth to see these “one year off” people as a person in leadership or authority. The 18/19-year old almost always creates more negative dynamics than its worth.

Here’s what I do: I ask them to step away for a year. In advance, I’ve found a few other options for places they can serve in the church. Usually I ask them if they’d like to serve in the children’s area as a step towards their readiness for being on my youth team. I share that when the year is up and they do come back to serve on the youth team, it will be with all the joys and expectations of being an adult.

Its not always an easy conversation, but one that has to happen. At least that’s my two cents worth.

Stephanie

In a Small Church Youth Ministry, youth pastors face some very significant realities:

Resources are Limited. Budgets are tight. Facilities are tight. And rarely are those going to change anytime soon. It is important to pick your events and your financial outlays strategically and  intentionally to get the most for your buck (or two).

Time is Limited. The demands on your time are ever-present. In most small churches, there are tasks and responsibilities that fall onto the shoulders of the Youth Pastor that are not directly youth ministry related. They may be vital to the overall health of the church… but they still take your time away from youth ministry.

Giftedness is Limited. Face it, you don’t do everything well. But every event/program that you create requires all types of giftedness: administration, execution, budgeting, marketing, communicating, etc. Accomplishing the tasks that fit your giftedness are easy. But accomplishing the responsibilities outside your giftedness drain you. And the giftedness required to accomplish those tasks are not always easy to locate.

Volunteers are Limited. The volunteer team available to as a Youth Pastor is more limited in a small church than in a large church. Even the team that you do have around you are often involved in other ministries around the church… like being the Senior Pastor for example. Because your volunteer staff is limited, fewer programs done well will always accomplish more than numerous programs that are understaffed.

Opportunity for Relationship is Limitless. Here is, of course, your greatest advantage over every large church youth ministry in the world… relationships in your context are far more accessible than in larger churches. It goes with the territory. A smaller church, a smaller ministry, and a smaller facility provide all the important elements for life-changing relationships to occur. This is not the case in large church youth ministries… why do you think they offer so many programs? They offer so many programs so they can better manufacture life-changing relationships! In other words, you already have everything they are hoping to accomplish with all their endless programming. You don’t need to program for it. It already exists. And taking time away from relationships to plan another event defeats the very purpose of the event in the first place.

In Small Church Youth Ministry, less is more. Correctly understood, you will find great freedom and opportunity in that truth. I know I did.

Joshua Becker blogs at Becoming Minimalist where he inspires others to find more life by owning fewer possessions. His new book, Living With Less: An Unexpected Key to Happiness has just been released by Group/Simply Youth and I highly recommend you check it out. Additionally, you’ll enjoy following him on Twitter.

Joshua Becker

Becoming Minimalist

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“Less is More in Small Church Youth Ministry” - Guest post by Joshua Becker – Part One

I learned youth ministry at one of the large churches in Omaha, NE. For two years, I served as a full-time intern alongside a High School pastor, a Junior High pastor, a Student Ministries pastor, and two other interns.

The church was healthy. The ministry was strong. And the internship was strategic. As a result, when I left the internship to pastor my own Student Ministry, I copied everything I had learned… and I copied it well.

There was only one problem: my new ministry was roughly 1/10 the size of the ministry I had just left. And copying everything I had learned became one of the biggest mistakes I ever made in Student Ministry. In just the first few months, I had started countless new programs, but the pace of ministry I had instituted was completely unsustainable. It was not only impeding my joy in youth ministry, it was not the most effective way to reach students in my new context.

It was roughly 10-12 months into my new position until a new paradigm for youth ministry began to emerge in my mind. “Less is more.” Fewer programs done with excellence would bear far more fruit than a calendar full of mediocre events. I pared down my strategy to just the most essential programs – choosing ones that highlighted my giftedness and our unique church culture. And less did, indeed, become more.

Initially, I made the decision only because what I had tried didn’t work and I knew I couldn’t sustain it professionally or personally. But looking back now years later, I can better articulate the specific reasons I found more joy and effectiveness in less programming.

(Part Two of Two in a few days)

Joshua Becker blogs at Becoming Minimalist where he inspires others to find more life by owning fewer possessions. His new book, Living With Less: An Unexpected Key to Happiness has just been released by Group/Simply Youth and I highly recommend you check it out. Additionally, you’ll enjoy following him on Twitter.   http://bit.ly/OZOLym

I don’t know what they’re doing over and up (if you live in TX) at Simply Youth Ministry, but this is an incredible deal. Plus you get to see Jason O in a pair of RED skinny jeans. He may be the coolest guy I know.

50% on resources from CIY, Marko, Group Mag, Kurt Johnston, Rick Lawrence, Brian Berry, etc.  http://bit.ly/QJFITi

Ever heard of Group Magazine? Sure you have! It’s THE youth ministry industry magazine. So if you know about the mag, you’ve chatted with Rick Lawrence or at least you’ve heard his voice over the rustle of pages.

Rick has a new book, Shrewd, which came out today. You and I need to read it. Why? Because its written by Rick.

Still not enough? I will tell you what I know. I’ve known Rick for 20 years. At first I was intimidated by him; after all he was the editor of my fave magazine. A magazine that felt like a life saver to me and in his workshops, I’d get all tongue-tied around him.

Then little by little I got to know him. I discovered that he was as down to earth and real as I’d hoped he’d be. He could even have his “less than cool youth dude” moments. I liked that.

When I first got a glimpse into his God-heart was at breakfast one morning in the Fairfield Inn in Loveland. He probably doesn’t remember the convo…but I do. I learned how much he loves God and wants to lift him up.

Rick is really identified by who he is within God and not by his job. I have seen it exemplified over and over. He is on my list of the top ten people I would turn to for spiritual shrewdness.

That’s why you should read his new book.

http://amazon.com/Shrewd-Daring-

Stephanie